We Need Outside Help
It was evident that a solitary self-appraisal, and the admission of our defects based upon that alone, wouldn't be nearly enough. We'd have to have outside help if we were surely to know and admit the truth about ourselves - the help of God and of another human being.
Only by discussing ourselves, holding back nothing, only by being willing to take advice and accept direction could we set foot on the road to straight thinking, solid honesty, and genuine humility.
If we are fooling ourselves, a competent adviser can see this quickly. And, as he skillfully guides us away from our fantasies, we are surprised to find that we have few of the usual urges to defend ourselves against unpleasant truths. In no other way can fear, pride, and ignorance be so readily melted. After a time, we realize that we are standing firm on a brand-new foundation for integrity, and we gratefully credit our sponsors, whose advice pointed the way.
As Bill Sees It - p248 - Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions - p59 - Grapevine from August 1961 (AA)
Yes, there is a long period of reconstruction ahead. . . .
Alcoholics Anonymous - p83 - from Daily Reflections (AA)
We try to remember that when we make amends we are doing it for ourselves.
Commentary: As long as we still owe amends, our spirits are cluttered with things we don't need. We're carrying the extra load of an apology owed, a resentment held, our unexpressed remorse. It's like having a messy house. We could leave so we don't have to see the mess, or maybe just step over the piles of debris and pretend they aren't there. But ignoring the disorder won't make it disappear. In the end, the dirty dishes, the crumb-filled carpet, and the overflowing wastebaskets are still there, waiting to be cleaned up.
A cluttered spirit is just as hard to live with as a messy home. We always seem to be tripping over yesterday's leavings. Every time we turn around and try to go somewhere, there is something blocking our path. The more we neglect our responsibility to make amend,s the more cluttered our spirits become. And we can't even hire someone to clean up. We have to do the work ourselves.
We gain a deep sense of satisfaction from making our own amends. Just as we would feel after we've cleaned our homes and have time to enjoy a bit of sunshine through sparkling windows, so will our spirits rejoice at our freedom to truly enoy our recovery. And once the big mess is cleaned up, all we have to do is pick up after ourselves as we go along.
Just For Today: I will clear away what's cluttering my spirit by making the amends I owe.
Just For Today - September 4th (NA)
Eye of the Hurricane
AA is spiritual, is the eye of the hurricane, is my refuge and my comfort.
Grapevine - Oklahoma City, Okla., December 1992 (AA)
Happy 50th post, everyone! Whether you're a regular ready of a passer-by, you make this all worth while to type out and help me sort my thoughts now for the day ahead of me, and maybe help you get your all in order too. I am grateful for this, the AA and NA program, and being able to examine shit from an objective manner, so shit can be cleaned. Thank you. Whether I have a lot to say or only one small point to make, this helps me look at myself before I can look elsewhere and make me a better me so I can help everyone else at my maximum and best Atma I can be.
Without others to help me build the foundation I am now the past few years, not just with AA and NA, I wouldn't be here to help you build yours, so I want you to take today to thank those that came before us and helped us get our houses clean so that we may now pass it down to the next one. Today, a woman showed up to my meeting afraid and panicy. Combined, we got her calm and assured and gave her our contact info so she can have someone to talk to in case of an emotional emergency. She, too, will get stuff in order, and it's only because I had help can I now help her. I'm glad she showed up and asked me so I can make good of the work I've been doing and show my word is gold. After all, I have to do this for myself, because without me, there can be no others saved.
Today, ask someone for some honesty. You'll be surprised what it can do for you, too. Maybe it'll even help them figure some stuff out.