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Daily thought/discussion post for 08/27/16

Hard on Ourselves, Considerate of Others

We cannot disclose anything to our wives of our parents which will hurt them and make them unhappy. We have no right to save our own skins at their expense.

Such damaging parts of our story we tell to someone else who will understand, yet be unaffected. The rule is, we must be hard on ourselves, but always considerate of others.


Good judgment will suggest that we ought to take our time in making amends to our families. It may be unwise at first to rehash certain harrowing episodes. While we may be quite willing to reveal the very worst, we must be sure to remember that we cannot buy our own peace of mind at the expense of others.

As Bill Sees It - p240 - Alcoholics Anonymous - p74 - Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions - p84 (AA)

A repeat of entry #1 on Atmaholics Post #3

It can still be read here

Choosing Life

Change from self-destructive patterns of life became necessary.

Commentary: Active [addiction] is a smoldering death-wish. Each of us courted death every time we [used]. Our lifestyles, too, put us at risk. The life of an [addict] is sold cheaply with every day and every [dose].

In recovery, the first pattern we change is the pattern of [using]. Staying clean is the start of our journey into life. But our self-destructive behavior usually went far deeper than just our [using]. Even in recovery, we may still treat ourselves as if we are worthless. When we treat ourselves badly, we feel badly. And when we feel badly, we seek relief - maybe in our old solution, [drugs].

Choosing recovery means choosing life. We decide each day that we want to live and be free. Each time we avoid self-destructive behavior, we choose recovery.

Just For Today: I will choose life by choosing recovery. I will take care of myself.

Just For Today - August 27th (NA)

The Business of Getting Ahead

You cannot get ahead until you learn to be here.

Grapevine - Manchester, Mass., October 1964 (AA)

Atma's Thoughts

A lot of this today is about being hard on ourselves and others not understanding. Society at large has issues with addicts, depressives, alcoholics, etc and as a result, treatment for us is little and hardly available and can be expensive if we can even find it, leaving a lot of genuine support unused and unheard of, which is why I've latched so hard to these meetings is for me, it's free, it gets me to vent about what I need, and I leave with stress unpacked and less on me than what I showed up with. I can't afford therapy on my own, even if I've finally broken down and admitted that yes, I do need some, but the money thing is an issue. I am lucky AA and NA are free and at its core values will always remain so.

It's like they understand it's stacked against us! I mean, they were built for this purpose. So as a result, we have people judging is, in therapy or not, so we're damned if we do and damned if we don't, but the stress "normies" put on us to recover and be of use to society is highly unfair to us and requires more time, money, and resources than they want to believe is required for it. They want to see it as an on/off switch so they can blame us wholly when we slip instead of seeing it as the end result or symptom of a much larger illness. Regardless of if you're an addict, an alcoholic, or a depressive or such, it's all an illness that none of us asked for.

No wonder we don't want to talk to them about it and we internalize it and blame ourselves. It's hard not to when it's all stacked against us. That's also why I'n grateful these groups and programs exist is so I can get help and can learn to stop blaming me instead of seeing it as a sickness that needs its treatment, and to find people that do understand what I'm going through, even if it doesn't seem like it at first, if someone does get it they do. And it is a wonderful feeling to hear your story in others' experiences.

We're not as alone as others would like to think and place a burden of help on us over, and I just hope it can spread out more and more.

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